Monday, September 21, 2009

bands or musical performers that i just can't support, aka i LOATHE, to be quite frank

In no particular order:

1. Matchbox 20.

I hate them. I hate Rob Thomas' voice. I hate the songs. His voice is extremely obnoxious to my ear drums and the songs get stuck in your head in a very very bad, very horrible way. Like a disease. Like the plague. On your brain. Brain Plague. And you question the way he sings. He's trying too hard? I don't know. His voice is bad. He's bad, and then also sloppy on top of that. Nothing good can come from that.

2. Creed.

Remember Creed? Holy suckity suckville. The way he sang was comical. I continuously wondered incredulously, really? are you being for real? This is seriously your sincere attempt at singing? Man alive, what a joke. A cruel joke. on mankind.

3. Dave Matthews Band.

DMB never made me as close to clawing out my eyeballs as other bands (MB20) but I never was into that style of music, whatever it is. Maybe it's Dave's voice. It gets to me after a while and, i don't know, the style of music doesn't make sense to me though I can't explain why. But I should speak in past terms because i haven't heard them for at least 6-7 years.

4. John Mayer.

BLAGH. that's about all i have to say.

5. Man, i hate Matchbox 20.

6. Beyonce.

I fail to hear the talent that seems to exist for so many others. She can carry a tune, sure, but her voice sounds shallow to me. It's the skin off the surface and nothing more. The annoying skin. Her voice is the equivalent of a tiny fly buzzing around your face. It's not big enough to draw your full attention right away yet you live for several minutes growing increasingly irritated until you lose it and slap yourself in the face in a mad fit.

Also, this isn't a band but I REALLY hate this. HATE HATE.

If there was ever a thing that would be the opposite of funny, it would be this. And yet, it is still on and people say it's funny and it even wins awards and things. I don't understand and never ever will. ever.

What are some bands (and i guess shows or whatever else) that you can't bring yourself to endorse?


Ashley said...

The comic strip Mutts. It's not even just not funny, it doesn't even make sense most of the time. Hate it.

)en said...

Mutts is so not funny, it makes me want to cry.

Britta said...

Nickleback. Yuck yuck yuck.

Andrew said...

I can't believe it. I agree with every single thing on this list.

Except DMB makes some fun stuff to play on guitar. Not particularly fun to listen to, but fun to play.

Joel said...

Any reality show ever. Period. I don't get any amusement out of people being made to suffer for the entertainment of others (unless I know them personally). And let's face it, that's all reality TV is: unscripted manipulation for ratings.

Natalie R. said...

I actually like MB20 and Beyonce, Creed is okay, but I really strongly dislike DMB and 2 1/2 Men - ick! I also don't like Macy Grey - remember when she was such a hit? Her voice just drives me nuts. The worst, though, is Bob Dylan - my dad used to sing Phantom of the Opera Bob Dylan style, and it almost ruined it. Almost.

Alanna said...

I actually really like the way Rob Thomas sings. He has this gravelly way of chewing up his words (especially his "r's") that I just find fascinating. I always wonder how he even came up with such a whacked out pronunciation? (And I did take six years of voice lessons, so it's not JUST that I'm a totally ignorant buffoon for thinking this...)

There are a few DMB songs that I love (like "Gray Street"), but I really don't know very much of their stuff. According to my husband, their drums are really cool, though (and he did marching band for forever, so I guess he should know some decent drumming when he hears it, right?). I saw them in concert and the main thing I remember now was that the drummer looked so dang happy to be there drumming away. I liked that a lot.

The only time I ever saw "Two and a half men" was on an airplane and I didn't have headphones to listen with. Guess I didn't miss out on much, huh?

I hate the comic strip "Gasoline Alley." Was it ever funny, even 150 years ago when it first ran?

(I don't find Mutts to be very funny either, but I sort of like the drawings at least...)

Scoresbys said...

I was preparing to defend James Taylor but you left him off the list. I have to tell you, I'm a sucker for Beyonce songs. Not all of them. But I liked her in Dreamgirls. And some of her songs are good for getting excited for dancing and singing around the house while cleaning. But Two and a half Men is ridiculous. Loathe is the correct term for sure!

Dom and Katie said...

important question: does your strong distaste for beyonce include her time with destiny's child? because i am more or less in agreement with everything you've said, but i need to know about destiny's child. this might change our relationship.

Scoresbys said...

Can I add someone to your list? He's not an actor or singer. In fact, he has no known talent. And still, he remains gainfully employed.

)en said...


i totally forgot about james taylor. *added* ;)

I don't have a suuuuper strong distaste for Beyonce. Clearly she has some star quality and she can sing i guess, in her way, and her songs are probably quite catchy though i am not too familiar with them to be honest. I just don't think she's AMAAAAZING like so many others seem to, and I wonder what's going on. I feel there is less there going on than what appears, if that makes sense.

Joel, you watch The Hills, admit it.

"ignorant buffoon"-- excellent. :D

Singing any song Bob Dylan style. That's just funny.

Man.. Al Roker. you are so right. I want to punch him in the face. In fact, i kind of want to punch all the Today Show people. I think I have an anger management problem.

the end.

Amber Alvarez said...

I am so confused. I was planning at some point to have you over for dinner so we could slam all of these stupid losers who are somehow famous despite their obnoxious personalities and talentless existance.

OF course I would add Nickleback and Michael Moore to the very tippity top of this list. I'd stick Cold Play in there for good measure too - That guy makes me cringe.

The sad part is that I was planning to have you over after I marry Rob Thomas... Hence my confusion. Please don't make me choose, Jen. Don't make me choose!

)en said...

No, Amber! Whyyyyyyyyy?

Kim said...

Not a performer but I can't stand Tyra Banks. Every time my roommate watches ANTM . . . shudder . . . I want to punch something. Ugh. It's actually making me angry right now just thinking about it.

Anonymous said...

Um, maybe I'm an outsider on this site, but I feel like I have an obligation to defend these artists. For starters, Matchbox 20 is my favorite band of all time, and Dave Matthews and John Mayer happen to be pretty far up my list, too. I can see if you don't have the same taste as I do, but I think Rob's voice is just fine. And his music is catchy, but in a good way, no? Plus, c'mon, Dave Matthews is incredibly talented when it comes to guitar playing. Although John Mayer may (as a person) be quite sketchy, he has some beautiful lyrics. Beyonce, well, she seems a little 'eh' to me. And I agree that Two and a half Men sucks. Sorry if any of this is taken the wrong way.