Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Word's a jerk

So i've been keeping a journal in Word for many many years in my life. It dates all the way back to December 16, 1993. I have a small anniversial moment of celebration each year on this day. I write in my journal and we talk about how much we've been through together. It's nice.

I have a separate journal document I've been writing in since i moved to Brooklyn several years ago. It is 550 pages long. Every once in a while I like to scroll to a random point in time and read about what happened then. I was doing this very thing a few minutes ago when all of a sudden, out of absolute nowhere a box popped up that said:

"There are too many spelling or grammatical errors in 'journal.doc' to continue displaying them."

Whoa, what the? Hey now, Word. Why the harshness? I was just randomly reading along, minding my business and this totally mean-spirited box pops up? It's all, "you're stupid and look ugly today." Why, Word? Why? And also it's like, i'm so sorry my idiocy has burdened you. Who asked? I mean, i know i don't talk so good but it is my journal, afterall. Not aiming for a pulitzer. So was that necessary? No, actually. I don't think it was. So thanks, Word. Thanks for the random unsolicited insult to brighten my day. jerk.


Ashley said...

That...is awesome.

Alanna said...

I used to use the "Office Mate," mostly because I would get bored at work and one of the features was a daily tip, usually about how to use Word or Excel. But one day the little helpful kitty-cat announced for the daily tip, "Stripes with polka dots rarely make for a good fashion statement." Since when did Microsoft geeks get to give fashion advice????

Kim said...

Geez. Sounds like some word processing software is getting a bit of an attitude.

Every once in a while, Word will try to auto-correct something for me and the suggestion they give is not grammatically correct and it brightens my day to know sometimes I'm smarter than my computer.

Ya head that, Word? You just got pwned!

Joel said...

I see that Microsoft's policy of "confuse and alienate our customers" is still in effect.