Friday, March 27, 2009

Would You Rather #3

Welcome to the weekend. Let's discuss some would-you-rathers to get us to the end of the day.

Would you rather chew like a cow -OR- laugh like a goat?

Hmm. So the question could also be, would I rather gross people out and have no friends or be totally super annoying and have no friends. Gross eaters are kind of the pits and, for some reason, have a way of getting under people's skin like nothing else can. On the other hand, a really annoying laugh can totally be a deal-breaker. I eat and laugh probably equally frequently (though not necessarily together) so what to choose? I can eat alone.. but probably don't laugh as much alone as when with someone, so i suppose I could opt not to eat with people, if I chewed like a cow, and save them from being grossed out, and then laugh with them like a normal person. But eating is a social thing too! But maybe not as social as laughing? Aaaah this is hard. I guess I choose chew like a cow. Maybe i could hide my face while I do it and offend less people than if I had a crappy laugh where all in proximity could hear. Man, i know how to choose the tough ones.

Would you rather share the entire interior of your home with a 1,500 pound dairy
cow -OR- with 2 free roaming sea gulls?

Let's weigh this out. Cow, pros: free milk! cows are nice. Cons: i have to milk it and i don't know how to pasteurize. Also, really big. Apartment small. Pro: slow, stands around mostly. Pro: I could pet it and say "nice ol' cow." Con: big piles of crap everywhere. Pro: Sean likes to paint cows. Pro: food storage??

2 seagulls, pros: birds are nice. Who doesn't want a pet bird? They're pretty too. Con: free, no cage. Could dive bomb at my face at any moment giving me perpetual heart attacks. Pro: the seagull call reminds me of the beach. Con: would they be constantly trying to fly out the window and splat against the glass? Pro: <--maybe this is a pro instead? (JOKE) Con: bird poop everywhere. Hard to identify. Pro: Doesn't smell as bad as cow's. Con: not much of food storage.

After weighing this out, and me generally being a pet person, I'd say I'd rather have a cow, despite its massiveness. Hello Ms. Friendly Cow. Could i put a cowbell on her sometimes? sold. And, i could chew like her and she wouldn't mind.
Would you rather invent a product that makes you the richest person in your city
-OR- invent a product that saves millions of lives in the third world but produces no profit for you?

My first reaction, as philanthropist, is to say "please. option #2 of course." But then i realized that being the richest person in my city would make me extremely rich. In many ways, I am very wary of money but in other ways, I want a lot of it. So I think I'll go with option #1 and use the bulk of my money to somehow save millions of lives in the 3rd world and be able to visit them (with my money) and take my posterity (using my money) and be more involved, and educate others about this endeavor, whatever it is, (using my money). Smart, eh? Either way, I've always wanted to invent a product. We all win. It's a win win win.


sarah said...

nick and porter choose seagull..."because seagulls can fly and cows can't. we like things that can fly." i'd have to say cow, i think i'd get used to the smell and i'd keep it in another room....flying seagulls means messes ALL OVER.

Pedersen Posse said...

Laugh like a goat... I kind of already do.


Invent the product that saves lives in the 3rd world country. I think I'd rather save lives than be that wealthy. Money is nice, but it comes at a price...

Joel said...

I'll go with the goat laugh, because at least I could amuse people that way.

I'll go with cow, too. We have a room big enough for one now.

I guess I'll go with the saving of lives. I have a feeling that if I were rich I'd turn into a jerk (or at least more so).

Kristina P. said...

Oh my gosh! I saw that article today, and I too was truly frightened. This is taking Snuggie to a whole new level!

Thanks for stopping by. I play Would You Rather with my anger management class. That's always an interesting experience.

Rob said...

1. Tough.I hate hate HATE loud eaters. Smacking your food gets a smack in your face when I'm around. However, nothing like an annoying laugh to ruin everyone's fun. suicide an option? NO? OK, I choose the laugh, just to avoid being hipocritical.
2. I choose Sea Gulls banking on the fact that when I leave the blinds open they will kill themselves by trying to fly out the window.
3. Most people in the world think you can only be rich/successful OR willing to give. I could help a butt load of people being really rich, and take more trips to Europe to celebrate. However, saving MILLIONS of people...done. If it were only several thousand people I choose richness money, but must be done.

in short, jen made all the wrong choices.

)en said...

We'll see, Rob. We'll see... should that fateful day arrive when I am forced to make these absurd decisions. Oh, we will see.