Tuesday, December 24, 2019

On the Eve

Here we are at the end.  Of the project. Of the year. Of the decade.  Being born in the year of a new decade, the turn of each one is always significant for me.  My life doesn't necessarily look how I may have thought but then I don't think I ever had a very clear vision.  But I definitely feel a turn rising. Nearing?  That good ol'  "at a crossroads" feeling.  I've never planned very far into my future but what I'm facing now feels particularly unknown.  What could this new decade possibly look like for me? I cannot even imagine.  I hope that's a good or maybe even a great thing.

To close it out, here are a couple of random blips that need to be put somewhere. On Christmas Eve sounds appropriate.

This was a conversation that took place at dinner a few nights ago.  I'm not sure it'll come across but it was too funny to me and I felt it important to record it:

JULIAN:  I'm going to make a goal to be less annoying and less weird.  That'll be my New Year's resolution."
JEN: Weird like what? Like talking about farts and stuff?
JULIAN: Yeah...  and bombs...
JEN:  Sounds good.
SEAN: But also remember to be yourself--
JEN:  --on the other hand, farts and poop....  *looks pointedly at Sean*  Dad doesn't know what he's saying.
JULIAN:  I used to do 8's like this *draws an invisible 8 on the table* and then in first grade, my teacher showed me to do it this way.     Sorry, let me turn it around so you can see.  *turns invisible 8 around*
SEAN: Oh, thank you, that 8 looks more normal now...
JEN: Yeah, I didn't know what that was. *laughter*
JULIAN:  *FLARP* (farts)  Excuse me! *embarrassed*  Geez, it's like a slide show of my life...

It's just the strangest sequence of events.  I could never have predicted it would go like that.

One more, because I think it's funny.  I read some dumb article or thread on twitter about some dude's misogynistic views of what men and women should be. He titled it "how to be a man/woman."  So I asked Julian, "what kinds of things would you list if you were describe how to be a man?   Here's his list:

How to Be a Man
by Julian

1. Try not to make rude gross disgusting comments at the table
2. Be more gentlemanly
3. Make charming jokes
4. Hold your fork with your left hand
5. Walk with your head held high
6. Stop carrying kegs and "party naked" t-shirts   [??]
7. Don't be awkward
8. Have words at the ready
9. Wear a simple suit with a tied tie that doesn't zip up and down [lol]
10. Make sure your hair is combed neatly so no hair horns are sticking up.
11.  Don't say anything if your date is wearing super high heels that make her look like she's standing on her toes.
12. Wear deodorant.
13. Try not to spill anything on yourself when you're eating.-- that's an important one.


How to Be a Woman
By Julian

1. Don't wear super high high heels
2. Ignore all the little mistakes that your date makes (I won't say "might make."  He will.)
3. Walk with your head held high
4. Try not to poop when your significant other is around (this goes for men too).
5. Don't make your voice sound sing song. Or sexy either.
6. Work as a librarian.
7. Be free to feel your own feelings. Men too.

Those are all in his own words and I was MUCH entertained by them.  Such good stuff.  This would be a good New Year's post but since I probably won't be blogging for a while, this'll have to count.  Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! 2019 OUT!... in a few days.


Joel said...

This is wonderful. Also, I am glad to pass the man test. Phew!

)en said...

I know, right? Same! I think I want to interview a bunch of kids and get their answers as well. hmm...new project?