Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Band Books

Recently my sister sent me an important link to an article on buzzfeed, where I get all my news, about some kind of banned books movement or something or other that turned into "band books" on twitter.  People combining the titles of books with band names. It is awesome.  Click here to read that important article to get the flavor of the game. 

I then pasted this link into a group conversation that included Suvi, Val, and Suzie.  Suzie wasn't quite an active participant because she was actively in labor. But she was still a part of the team and we dedicated the text to her, as our gift.  This began in the early evening and stretched on intermittently for hours. Paul, espoused to Suvi, and James to Val, later joined the conversation.   Being a part of group texts can be really annoying-- when the conversation is lame. But when it's NOT lame, it can be magical.  I really love them.  Instead of screen capping a million times I will just organize our #bandbooks by author. I've asterisked my favorites. Vote for yours.  Enjoy, and feel free to add on. It's kind of addicting when you get your brain on it.

Before we begin, let's meet the players.

Jen: blogger, writer, inventor, inspirer.  Spent much of her college career writing extemporaneous voluntary poetry or essays within mandatory essays or tests, and winning the occasional "bonus point for creative answer."  


Sean: Painter, collage-r, thinker, certified genius. Can captivate any audience while simultaneously producing wondrous, tear-inducing creations out of legos.

Suvi: Adventurer, studier, crusader, Finn. A sufferer of moderate to severe FOMO, this do-gooder has literally done it all. An accomplished chef and on a quest to save the world. Not with her cooking. Those are unrelated. (Or are they??)


Paul: Spreadsheet wizard, traveler, persuader.  This baritone-voiced, smooth sauce of a giant can talk you into believing an-y-thing. Has the ability to see the whole picture, and organize it into appealing graphs and statistical depictions.

Val: Runner, actor, author, daydream believer.  Has a courageous heart, a bottomless well of a brain, and an actual wall-mounted plaque for literally knowing all the words. Has magical powers of making those around her seem smarter than they actually are.

James: Wonderer, philosopher, paradigm-shifter, nerd. Kid-hearted and faced, laughs don't come cheap with this guy, because he has actually copyrighted every single one of his jokes, past present and future.

Suzie: Philanthropist, truth-seeker, listener, life-puncher.  This beloved and clever combination of wacky wit, awkward charm and super-sparkle will humor you, champion you, and guaranteed endear you. You'll love so much about the things she chooses to be.

And without further ado...


Metallicall of the Wild

The Rolling Stone Soup

A Wind in the Doors

Frog and Toad the Wet Sprocket

They Might BFGiants

Linkin Jurassic Park

Fall Out of the House of Usher Boy (that one's a 2-fer)

Oliver Twisted Sister

Where the Red Hot Chili Pepper Fern Grows

1984 Non-Blondes


Of Mice and Men at Work

A Town Like Alice in Chains

The Old Man and the TLC*

Guns 'n Roses, Germs and Steel

Lady Antebellum of the Lake*


A Brave New Kids on the Block World

The Wizard of Ozzie Osborne

World War Jay-Z

Anne of Green Day Gables

(Jane) Eyre Supply (possible winner. Everyone exploded in text cheers)

Crash Test Accounting for Dummies*

The New Jim Counting Crows



Lorde of the Flies*

Oh the Places You'll Go Team

Supertramp Baby

The Jonas Brothers Karamzov

Pearl Jam of Great Price*

Gullivers Traveling Wilburys

David Archeleta Copperfield

Rage against the Time Machine

The Three Musketeers for Fears*

The Greatful Dead Gatsby

Uncle Tom Waits Cabin

The Bell Jars of Clay

All Quiet on the Kanye Western Front


Blues Traveler with Charley

The Little Artist Formerly Known As Prince *

The Secret Soundgarden*

Lord of the Promise Ring

A Neon Tree Grows in Brooklyn*

RhiAnna Karenina (collaborative effort with a friend)


Of Modest Mouse and Men

Guns 'n Rosencrants are Dead

Eat, Slayer, Love*

The Sun Also Rises Against the Machine

And Then There Were None Direction*

To Kill a Mocking Andrew Bird

The Band Heart is the Loneliest Hunter

Zen and the Art of Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

The Shins-ing*

The Things They Carrie Underwood

What We Talk About When We Talk About Heads


And there you go. It was magnificent.


Amber Alvarez said...

I think Paul wins with Lorde of the Flies - simplicity is always the purest genius. To James' credit And Then There Were None Direction* slayed me.

)en said...

I agree. Paul was out of control. Some of them are sooo funny. Why are they funny? Are we just mega nerds? So be it.

Joel said...

I can't help but add a few.

Moby Dick(No modification needed)
Calamity Jane Eyre
Alice Cooper's Adventures in Wonderland
The Woman in White Zombie
The Man in the Iron Maiden
The Call of the Wyld Stallyns
Horton Hears The Who
Tinker Taylor Swift Soldier Spy

Alanna said...

I now feel like none of my friends are cool enough and I desperately want you to write a bio for me some day, if I can ever be worthy...

Amber Alvarez said...

Oh man, how did I not see OF MICE AND MEN AT WORK earlier? Sean is still in this race.

)en said...

This is some quality stuff, Joel. Horton hears the who?? Outstanding. Also, bonus points for wyld stallyns.

)en said...

Of course, I would be honored. 😬