We Can't All Be Photographers

Something I love, one of my favorite little delights of humanity is the "passerby photographer."   I'm pretty sure everyone on this green earth can take a picture. Some take better pictures. Some have better equipment for better pictures.  But I think most of us know general rules of a basic photograph:  make sure your object of photographic desire is actually in the scene.  If you have eyes that see, this can't be hard. Right? Well, enter the Passerby Photographer Phenomenon.  We've all either been perpetrators, victims, or fortunate witnesses.

Speaking from the point of view of the hapless perpetrator, we're out and about, we see someone taking pictures of their friends or family and we extend a kindly hand to take their picture.  Suddenly we are overcome with a freakish inability to operate this newfangled machinery.  Suddenly the year is 1605, and what is this new devilry??  Why.. I.. I can't work this thing at ALL!  You say push this obvious button here? Where? HERE?  When? Now?! I CANT DO IT! I'M SO NERVOUS.  And we don't wait until they're ready, we forget the purpose of a photograph, the camera is made of hot lava, we are sure of it, and we push the mystery button and get it out of our hands as fast as possible.   Maybe we know, at the last second, we took a horrible picture and want to flee the scene and hopefully our shame.  I don't know. But like I said, it's a phenomenon.

I was talking about this joyfully with a friend of mine and she told me about an outing she and her family had where a woman who seemed to have her wits about her, was watching my friend's husband take pictures with his phone of his wife and kids.  Now, we don't all have camera phones, but we know they're out there. And I think a reasonably intelligent human can follow instructions of "it's this button here."  Same as a regular camera.    Of course, it's an easy mistake to accidentally get your finger in the scene, but we try not to do it. We know it's generally not desired.  And yet...

The woman approached my friend, offered her services, they gave instructions, and enter the story, told by the camera itself.  So funny.

this button here? ok, *snap* 

Aaah, sorry, i'm suddenly feeling very anxious. are you ready now? I don't care! *snap*

now?? 

how about now!!? YOU KIND OF LOOK READY!

Aaahhh, i know my finger's covering it; I can't stop!!! HOT LAVA!!

AAAAH! thatlooksnicegotta go--here!!   *snap* *flees*

The end.