Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Courage Under Disgustingness
To see a cockroach in your kitchen is extremely unpleasant. The big ones are the most disgusting, of course. It may not happen often but when it does, it sends your entire body into convulsions and you suffer from it for hours afterward. Comparatively, seeing a tiny cockroach might not be a big deal, such as I did tonight. They are too young to have the capability or experience to move fast, and naively venture out, making themselves easy targets. I mistook the tiny one on the wall tonight for a little spider and first thought how cute it was before I realized it was a disgusting cockroach. But no matter, it's tiny and slow right? But then if you see another, and another, I can't quite possibly convey to you the surge of terror that fills your entire being when you're jarred with the realization that there must be some kind of HATCHERY in your house and that it's just become alive. Moreover, it's in a difficult-to-get-to place. When this happens, there is only one thing left to do: Take apart your kitchen and spray down the walls with bug killer, smashing poisoned and dazed cockroaches as they stagger into view, hoping you get them all before you finally crash to the floor, dead, a victim of heart failure.